Thursday, June 05, 2008



13 Actual Label Instructions on Consumer Goods



On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.



On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."




On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."



On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."



On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."



On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."



On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."



On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."




On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."



On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."



On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."



On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."



On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."


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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


theteach

18 comments:

Jim said...

Numeral 12 implies that the kid is old enough to, and can, read the instructions.

Numeral 13 implies that Swedish chainsaw operators are male.

They are all fun! Thank you.
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Jim said...

I finished my "Getting to Know you Meme" for you. Please don't grade for grammer or punctuation, it was a nightmare to formulate.
..
BTW, I enjoyed doing it. One of my blogging delights is to protest vigorously when tagged.
..

crazy working mom said...

Hah! Too funny. Great post. Happy TT.

WillThink4Wine said...

It's hilarious, until you stop and realize that there is a high probability that a lawsuit caused each of the manufacturers to re-write their instructions and warning labels. That Swedish fellow who decided to use his genitalia to stop that chain saw deserves his very own monument to stupidity, doncha think?

Roger said...

Those are crazy especially the chainsaw wow!

marcia said...

Yikes this is such a scary statement of language and intelligence

Playful Professional said...

I've heard most of these before, but they still make me laugh every time. But I am wondering what is the Japanese's other use for a food processor?

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

Makes you wonder doesn't it? Can people be so stupid? I guess they can. Have a great day Teach. :)

Suzie said...

I was just about to iron myself., Thank goodness for that warning

Ivanhoe said...

I think you must have made some of them up! ;o)
Very funny ,teach, my favorite is #13. Have a great day!

Denise Patrick said...

Funny list.

Happy TT!

Bond said...

And all there because people tend to be idjits at times and then look to blame someone else with lawsuits....

Sassy Mama Bear said...

See here lies the reality that is America, the majority of the population lacks plain old common sense.

Laura said...

The scary thing...someone was paid to come up with those? AND someone actually tried them...

People are funny!

Happy T13!

SandyCarlson said...

These are fun, Mary. I do know a woman who would steam her skirts while she was wearing them--but she couldn't afford a Rowenta!

Jennifer said...

Darn... that was how I intended to stop my Swedish Chainsaw...

storyteller said...

What a hilarious list! I’ve often thought directions funny when reading them, but I’ve never thought of gathering them together like this. Very entertaining. My T-13 is at Small Reflections ;--)
Hugs and blessings,

Travis said...

The sad thing is that in a few of those cases, someone did the thing that is being warned against and sued the company, thus prompting the warning.